Ummm What?????

Read like you can hear my voice…well those that know my voice..enjoy.

WTF…but I’m super duper happy!!! Let me tell you my short little story that turned my world right side up. 

 I got a letter from the doctor after my completed procedures…Imagine me sitting next to the campfire with the night sky sparkling above, a blanket over my head, and a flashlight held up to my face. Lol. DO IT!!!!

Did you do it??? Keep hold of that image…

This letter tells me NO celiac disease found. Mind blown!! It’s bursting at the seams so over joyed. POP!!

Mind you I need to wait to officially confirm with the other doctor BUT omgoodness….I am not always careful what I order so I’m sure well actually I know I’ve eaten gluten occasionally over several months. Since reading this letter all I can think about is how I need to plan another Disney trip but only because I want a damn churro, monte cristo AND beignets!!! Then there’s all the other food I’ve cut out since being told I’m a celiac in 2019!! 

Omgoodness. Excuse me while I clean up my drool…

  • Cinnabon
  • Christmas cookies
  • Crab rangoon
  • Sushi
  • Chicken tenders
  • Fried chicken
  • McDonald’s fries!! 

Umm what else…

  • Normal tortillas
  • Burritos at Mexican restaurants and Taco Bell bahaha
  • PASTA
  • Yummy pizza crust
  • ICE CREAM with cookie and brownie pieces

Ugh so much food. Where do I even start?? Well with the doctor I guess…

  • Omgoodness Olive Garden
  • Never ending pasta 
  • Portobello ravioli 
  • Bagels 
  • Potlucks I’ve missed 
  • Red vines oh my
  • Pretzels with cheese sauce 🤤
  • Chinese food get in my belly 
  • Hot dog at baseball games
  • Birthday cupcakes!!
  • All the bread!!!
  • No label looking – playing I spy for GF
  • All my favorite Oreos!!!!!
  • Crazy bread
  • Stouffers Mac n cheese 
  • Crazy bread!!!
  • Goldfish!
  • Chez- its!!
  • Angel hair pasta 
  • Pasta Roni 
  • Western bacon cheeseburger from Carls Jr
  • Doughboy donuts
  • Corn nuts
  • Panda Express 
  • Top Ramen
Orange Chicken WHAT

When you have to choose a place and you realize it’s gonna be tough since you can eat everywhere your mind spins with happiness of what you’re about to enjoy (but it’s also overwhelming) that you never thought you would eat again, well maybe on my death bed at 105 LMAO. 

The grocery bill is magically way less…I can afford to eat again!!! Here I am dancing around with my glittery unicorn wand…

It’s been almost a full month since this new adventure of happiness has started. My son and his girlfriend asked me to compare certain foods that I remember the taste of…so far:

Cheez-its- regular ones. I could have sat down and ate the whole box. I was so excited they were coming out with GF ones in 2026, but I was really getting impatient. I did not eat the whole box, but I wanted to.

KitKats…I loved these, but the one I borrowed from my youngest, lol, was so gross. Come to find out it was a frozen stale KitKat…make sure these are not stale. Vomit! so much yumminess when fresh. I “borrowed” half of her replaced one, lmao.

Went to the OG with my fam. “Breadsticks Gang” as my son called us, but I didn’t have any, because I wanted room for my Never Ending Pasta bowls…they got in my belly, the mushroom sauce still amazing, wish it was a year round flavor!

I can’t seem to find the pistachio oreos, major sad face. 

Sushi for our anniversary…omgoodness I missed being able to order anything and everything. Well, the night of our anniversary we were shopping at Costco, because I needed snacks…AND I had Costco pizza, which I didn’t mind at all…drooling all over the place like a St. Bernard puppy. Someone grab me a bib!!

For breakfast at the NV Day Parade I filled up with dos Tipsy Lavender Lemonades and some Carls Jr. lol…

Doughboys…it melted in my mouth, the yummy warm maple gazed twist.

Yummy warm melted goodness

Okay, flash light off…blanket still over my head, because I am probably freezing…

I am having fun introducing all the foods I once loved back into my life. It has been quite the adventure. 

In no means do I regret being GF for the years I was, it taught me more than I realized it would. My heart goes out to those who can’t have gluten in their diet, yes food is becoming better tasting, but for an autoimmune disease that has been out there for over 100 years you would think there would be more food options in ALL stores, the food costs would be comparable to all food prices, and it wouldn’t be such a struggle to attend amusement parks, potlucks, and restaurants, etc. 

Breakfast Work Potluck

If you are the type of person who likes to donate to shelters, food pantries, etc, please think about those who have special diets and donate for them too.  

So, after my fun-ness of medical procedures I know my insides are healthy, my throat was stretched, would never recommend this unless it’s needed, so now no more choking…go ahead let your mind wander on that one.

If you are given a blood test for gluten and it’s positive, DEMAND a biopsy. Read your results, copy and paste them into google – it will break them down for you in words that are understandable. 

The best advice that was ever given to me by a doctor during COVID, ‘you are your own advocate, do your own research (I personally suggest looking at the UK research) and fight for your rights’. You can fire your doctor. You can get second opinions. And you can see all your doctor’s notes, it’s your right, they are usually posted in your chart, so download the medical apps, know what is happening with your body. 

I can poop some magical poop again!! Bahaha sorry not sorry. 

Love you all!! Thank you for enjoying my nonsense. 

AND as always…

Remember to enjoy the Sunshine, Sparkles, and Mother Fucking Unicorn Poop!!!!!

Used Tissue

Do you ever feel like you are someone else’s used tissue? They just wham, bam, smacked your ass, asked for a tissue to clean up their sticky mess and left you there going what the fucked just happened? Or their door mat? They wipe their fucking muddy ass boots all over it and shake it out when they feel the need to actually do something? Or maybe you are just an ATM. I need this, I need that. Fuck you!

I talk to many friends that are so unhappy in their situations. Or maybe some just love drama. But no seriously it is sad. I know there are three sides to every story. Each person’s side and the truth, but how many of us actually take the time to listen to all three sides? We don’t. We take sides. We join the drama. We add to the sticky mess in the tissue that can only hold so much.

But here’s the kicker! It is not just romantic relationships that have sticky used tissues, muddy door mats, or ATM abuse. Friendships go through the same mother fucking bullshit. Anyone have that friend who loves to swim in drama? Like a sperm finding an egg…yeah you know the one. They have to blame everyone for their bullshit lies. The lies that eventually karma will let slip and when that happens there will not be enough tissues to clean up that fucking mess. But like I said before; karma and me we tight bitches. I know how she works. I would never want to cross her again. She can be evil, your worst nightmare once she catches onto your games. You cannot run and hide from her. So, I just sit here waiting…

You can only be a used tissue, door mat, and an ATM for so long before you have had an enough. There are a very select few that know about my blog in my circle. I have been nervous to share it, because even though I do not care what others think about me, I do. But over the last few weeks I have grown stronger and I have realized why am I worrying? I am a used tissue and a door mat. I say FUCK THAT SHIT!

People can clean up their own damn sticky messes and shake out their own rugs. I love being here for my family and friends and I will always be someone they can count on. But to those who just use and abuse, blame their wrong doings on others….fuck that shit….clean up your own damn messes, because people who constantly choose themselves; yeah I do not have time for that bullshit. Need a box a tissues or tampons? Do us all a favor and drive yourself to the store and buy the product and stop blaming your problems on everyone else. Grow a pair of lady or man balls, look in the mirror, and face the fucking truth. The raw truth.